This is an amalgamation of thoughts. There were two isolated situations which started off a train of thoughts. I'm not very sure how well i would put it across, but it is something which has been on my mind and what better way than this to get it out.:)
Recently a friend changed her profile picture on orkut from a faceless one to one of her own. A few days later she returned to the earlier one. The reason being too much attention of the wrong kind!! That's been my experience too, whenever i change my pictures. Wham!!! my scrapbook gets flooded with flattering comments. Unfortunately it also attracts some unwelcome attention with unknown guys wanting to be ‘frenz’. Huh????In Orkut, the word 'friend' is perhaps the most misunderstood term...sigh!
The second case was when an online friend refused to put her picture on because she wasn't comfortable with the way she looked. She felt people wouldn't want to know her because she didn't look good...Why would you want to know someone who is going to talk to you based on how you look?
So it struck me…that looking good has its perils too. Often it is the way you look and dress which gets you the attention of the wrong kind and statistically has led to uncomfortable situations. It also makes me wonder whether wanting to look good is a crime. There are times i wonder whether a certain person is talking to me because he likes the face he sees!!
Don’t get me wrong, compliments from friends are always welcome and appreciated, barring the ones which cross the line. But the second case also led me to think about how much people weigh looks. Do men get the same response from females? We women are conditioned to do a lot. We nurture, we manage homes, we multitask, we work, we don't adam-tease and we are expected to look good too. I don’t see men worrying about maintaining themselves as much as we women do…and it seems to be another millstone that we have tied to our own neck. Of course there are exceptions to every rule.
I don't consider myself beautiful but I like myself the way I am. I'm confident with my skin and i don't need to hide anything, neither my age nor my crows feet. Every wrinkle tells a tale and shows me the times that I have worried. Every laugh line too shares a beautiful story.
There is too much emphasis placed these days on beauty. You have botox, plastic surgery and hordes of anti ageing devices. I too have personal dislikes of certain aspects of my anatomy but no way will I mess with nature.Being always well manicured and coiffeured is a dream to me, as that is the privilege of the ultra rich.That does not mean i wouldn't visit a saloon. It is nice to feel pampered once in a while.
In a society which lauds a pencil thin figure and perfect beauty with pageants glorifying the same, it is easy to forget the value of the beauty within. When I see girls starving themselves to get that perfect body, I wish i could tell them that they are killing themselves. There is surely more to life than that impossible figure...
Attitude indeed matters and a positive outlook can get that glow in your face. I should know, because I have felt the change in me. Taking a little interest in how you look coupled with the right attitude is the first step. You need to feel confident to look good. If you don't like yourself, how would you ever expect someone else to?
My take on beautiful is, look good on a strong foundation of positive attitude, self assurance and inner peace. And my dear friend, don’t ruin your life chasing that perfect look, figure or beauty. Live healthy and enjoy life. Everyone has something attractive about them, it could be the way you talk, or the way you sing. it could be your sense of humor or the way you write. Find them out, develop them and believe in yourself. Let no one tell you or make you feel otherwise. When you feel good about yourself, it is bound to show outside too. My challenge is to be beautiful inside…
So ask yourself this and keep that finger pointed to yourself, and if you are a guy, do make that special girl happy by making her feel beautiful.Even a diamond comes from a not so beautiful rock.This was my view. What do you think?