Wednesday, January 30, 2008

A shower of blessings!!

A lazy evening, kids excited because their grandpa had come a-visiting, me in the kitchen rustling up dinner, when THUD! There was a loud sound which could have meant only one thing.

Three people converged from various corners to see lil S sprawled on the floor. When he got up, my heart lurched. His whole face was covered with blood and for a second we had no idea where he was hurt – internally or externally. Luckily he had missed teh glass door nearby. There was so much blood that it was scary, not to mention the big brother howling away! A quick glance showed a deep gash near the eye and we, pretending to be brave, rushed to the emergency care, very worried that there was some damage to his eye. Hours of anxious waiting followed, where the doctors patiently reassured us that he was fine and just needed stitches. We held his hands, we talked to him but he was not fooled, he kept fighting his sedation because he did not want to lose sight of us. The poor boy finally slept on the drive home, with us feeling guilty for not having prevented it. Ten years of parenting should have hardened us, kids fall, that's part of growing up but try telling that to my heart

Two days later, the lil one back to his antics, I sit down to finish my pending work. I open my comment box to read a message which led me to Madhu’s blog. And I see this.

Another whimsical post to you, madhu for this blessing. You have no idea how much it meant to me.

This tag is a blessing in disguise and i'm glad that i can keep up this chain. I have been asked to select three people and direct some positive vibes their way. And this picture below

is to represent that the tag is indeed traveling virtually across the world. For the sake of the chain, i can tag only a few, but i do wish the very best for everyone reading this.


Prats – a wonderful person in all ways that matter. I pray that you continue bringing warmth and sunshine everywhere you go.

Ziah – You definitely need this. May the 18 hr workdays decrease and your posts increase... :) Hopefully this accelerates the muffet writing process ;)

UL – for her delightful and creative posts. She’s a special blog friend and I wish the very best for her.

Preethi - I hope that that i continue getting my daily fix of little Nantu and your creative outbursts

and I tag you, now pass your blessings around and do your bit of wand waving.

I did feel like the fairy godmother here!

Thursday, January 24, 2008

Superwoman,who me? nah!!!!

I am not a punching bag when things go wrong

I am not a Google toolbar that you stand at the doorway and ask/ holler, ...”Where’s my socks’

I am not a trash bin, dustbin, a kuppe basket, whatever

Working from home doesn’t mean I have free time, it means I have no time

I don't have to be guilty if i feed them maggi(instant noodles) once in a while, they love it and its easy

I cannot please everyone, there will be one person unhappy...let it not be me

I cannot have more hands than two, more hours than 24, so bear with me

I am not a super mom/superwoman

Sorry to break your hearts, but the above was not a tirade against the hubby… he has enough tensions battling it out in the corporate world to even attempt to get into another potentially explosive battle ground …That was more directed towards me! and a wake-up call to all those wanna-be superwomen.

Not so long ago, I used to think that I had to be perfect, in every role that I found myself in. Of course being young then, I had the advantage of being overconfident. But gradually when ‘a’ role morphed into many, umpteen ones, I was no less then a juggler, trying to juggle between them all. There would evidently be an unsatisfactory performance somewhere. Anytime I slipped, my failure would mock me. Or the wagging fingers would pounce and shred my entire attempt to pieces.

The culprit here is none other than yours truly. I realized that my own bar was raised so high that no one else could top it, including me. It does get quite stressful. Being superwoman is not what I want…..

I gave up trying to explain to people that working from home does not mean that I am trying to fill my extra time (what’s that?) with some work. It is something I’ve opted to do; because it gives me the huge advantage of being there for my children. There have been times when I have sat up nights finishing a deadline, to compensate for those hours spent with the kids. So I do exercise the right to say that I am busy…because I am!!

I gave up trying to be superwoman ages ago. That was when I realized that I was driving myself too fast trying to achieve all those fabulous results, some preconceived and some forced. Expectations can really tie you down. Some are necessary to self motivate you and some just threaten to suck you deeper into that quagmire.

It IS better being a not so super person with regular abilities than dying early trying to keep up with these self imposed missions.

I would like to think that I have prioritized my expectations and learnt to let go. It has made a difference; I am not likely to reach my grave too soon. In fact if your kids see you human and fallible, it helps. They end up not having an unreal image of you and empathize. They would feel better knowing that even you can make mistakes and it is human to err! There are times when I purposely attempt a dazed momma look and see my elder son exasperatedly doing a job…but it teaches him to be more efficient…

Delegation is a better idea and does not really take away anything from your inherent abilities! A little flexibility and realistic scheduling work wonders too.

Personally I cannot be superwoman …firstly her costume is too tight. I won’t fit into it. Secondly she’s unreal. And if she looks like that, she is the cause of more accidents that involve the male populace.

Super man on the other hand deserves a standing ovation. Anyone who can fly around saving the world with his red chaddi on a blue skintight hugger is super brave… ( not talking about chris reeve here)

So I repeat, I am not a superwoman, I’m just super at being myself!!!!

We all ARE!

Monday, January 21, 2008

A routine, a change and some fun!

S looked at his mother and sighed. Home because his kindergarten was off, he had waved goodbye to his brother and father. They certainly seemed to be having more fun than he was!…

He looked at his mom, sitting before her computer pounding away at the keyboard…and he sighed…He went back to his coloring, wondering when he should start pestering her for tv viewing time. Maybe she will be so busy she may actually say yes…

Suddenly his mother got up, went out of the room and came back with a basket. “Get ready”…she said “Let’s go”

“Where?” he asked

“Anywhere, let’s explore”

COOL! Exploring! He changed quickly and got his little Spiderman along , just in case!

So they walked, saw a chameleon and a snail on the way. They reached a lake, where his mother went “Ooh and Ahh” over some green grass and trees…while his heart did flips when he saw the awesome adventure playground.

“Whee…this was fun!” he thought. There were obstacle courses and Spiderman webs to be climbed! They played together for what seemed like hours and even polished off the goodies mummy had packed. It sure felt good to be here, just mom and him.

On the way back, they got into a double decker bus. S sat right at the top and felt like the king. Things sure looked different from this level. Where are we going? He asked MOM…

‘Hmmm…. I don’t know” She said “I think we are lost”…

She didn’t seem too worried and S was thrilled that they were lost. Another adventure!

After a little roaming around where he and Spiderman saved a few accidents, they got down and S saw another favorite place, the library! He got a huge bundle of books and his mother read book after book, till the end of it all, her voice went a bit funny. S loved the tales of a tinysauraus and the adventures of the little alphabets that flew everywhere on a pencil…

After a lunch of mushroom soup and pizza, they reached home, without any more mishaps.

When his father came home, he was greeted with “Papa, I had such a fun day today…we got lost and then ….”

The ramblings went on, and this mother looked on amused and happy. Another beautiful memory to be tucked into my little treasure chest! The delight on his face was worth the extra hours which would be spent at night, trying to tackle that workload!

It had started like any other day. A Monday and the familiar routine...the packing of kid and husband to school, the same mails to be tackled, pages to be edited and the articles to be finalized for the magazine. I had looked at my little boy sitting near the window, surrounded by his books, crayons and coloring pages waiting patiently for that time when his mother would be free. I had looked at him and looked back at my computer, and that was when i thought, let's have a different monday. (one of the few advantages of working at home)

The writer's island prompted a take on 'fork in the road'. Today was no crossroad of my life, but it definitely was a change in the path and it turned out to be different and interesting. I liked the choice i made today. The fork of change that I plunged in certainly brought out rich pleasures.

There are times when the mundane rules our lives, when life gets very mechanical … why not rock it up with a little change?

Spontaneity can be fun!!! Go on, try it...don’t take my word for it !!

Monday, January 14, 2008

A treasure worth craving for!

This time the writer’s prompt was treasure…and what a treasure of a prompt…it firstly evoked in me an image of pirates and then of course, Johnny Depp…sigh…...double sigh!!!

I had to delve deep into my mind to unearth something treasure worthy…As i opened my my treasure chest of memories…lovely little images flew past. Isn't it wonderful to remember the pictures you conjure up when you see that letter, that strand of hair, a photo, a first footprint, a birthday card, a love note, shells, postcards, mementoes - all bound by the common thread of nostalgia. Various jigsaw pieced memories joined together to form a beautiful collage of nostalgic moments… This was a treasure worth writing about but there were so many, what would I choose?

I then thought about my kids and a treasure I would like them to discover, a treasure they would keep!

What greater treasure can I write about than the one I carry around every time I move house. In the numerous occasions I have set up home in new cities, one thing never changes, that little reading space I create. BOOKS, they indeed are a treasure worth collecting.

From the Enid Blyton phase, to Shakespeare, to Charles dickens; I’ve read, and read and reread most of them. I fell in love with reading at a very young age and it’s an on going love affair!
Only a lover of books would understand the pleasure you get from curling with a good book in hand. The excitement of feeling that book in your hand waiting for the moment you can open the pages and immerse yourself in it. That feeling of being taken to places you may never visit and being pulled through a gamut of emotions, is something to be experienced and never to be forgotten! Some books have brought a lump to my throat and made me cry. Many have made me laugh and still others have made me ponder. What power the writer has, to use his words to manipulate our emotions so well!

As the old Chinese saying goes “To read a book for the first time is to make an acquaintance with a new friend; to read it for a second time is to meet an old one. “ I’ve re-read a few only to be surprised by the novelty of the experience, each time!

Here in Singapore, we have beautiful public libraries,in every nook and corner, huge and inviting! It is our favorite haunt and we make the optimum use of the facilities available. My son and I share a common bond which strengthens every time we add a book to our collection. He’s a voracious reader, all of 10, and has graduated long back from the Hardy Boys stage to a wider range of writers including Cornelia Funke, Angie Sage, Mark Twain, Roald Dahl and Satyajit Ray. A Harry Potter fan, he intends to write a note to J.K Rowling about some loose ends that he ‘thought’ she had left open!! I think he's well on his way to collecting his treasure.

What greater treasure can I leave them than this, my bookcase full of books, their value not measured in monetary terms but from what we have managed to take from it?

It is rightly said that reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body…Go ahead and read all you can…Find that treasure and build on it…I promise you , you won’t regret it!...

Friday, January 4, 2008

something's burning!

I'm a good cook...but a forgetful one now-a-days, especially when i've turned the burner low ...

yesterday i was pounding away at my keyboard (those dratted deadlines) when a vague smell assailed me. i sniffed and ...sniffed some more...i checked the toilets...with boys you never know what you can find in there...

Then omg! a tubelight leapt to life in my mind. A vision of a dish fighting for its life! I made a dash to the kitchen to see the pan and the contents the same color black. What started out to be fried paneer (cottage cheese)for a dish turned out to be smouldering whatever. Blame my mag..and blogger for this :(

...of course i wanted to take a picture of the burnt dish but i got a GLARE for this!!!

It so happened that someone was expected for dinner. Anyways you don't become a mother of two boys without being innovative, I added a substitute and the result was delicious...Luckily that was the last minute addition to a gravy and everything else was ready, so saved the dinner and my reputation . Why is that only the women are supposed to know cooking?

But...this post was more about a realization that i'm aging well. 10 yrs back this would have merited an oscar winning performance of shock and i would have been horrified and perhaps ended up taking the guest out for dinner. but no more!!!i just take life as it comes...Nothing is worth getting very frazzled about. Now if someone breaks a plate i say...oh! well, time to buy a new one...

And yes, the younger says when i toast bread...umm..amma, i like it the bread color!!!!!!!!!**cheeky guy

and the elder says...i love toasting bread can i do it?***subtle isn't he?

and i say.."Great, can i have one too?"***smart me :)

Psst...moral...i write..therfore i burn...some burn midnight oil, i burn food...

please do hop here to see some spontaneous fun!!!

Wednesday, January 2, 2008

hey...looking good!!!

This is an amalgamation of thoughts. There were two isolated situations which started off a train of thoughts. I'm not very sure how well i would put it across, but it is something which has been on my mind and what better way than this to get it out.:)

Recently a friend changed her profile picture on orkut from a faceless one to one of her own. A few days later she returned to the earlier one. The reason being too much attention of the wrong kind!! That's been my experience too, whenever i change my pictures. Wham!!! my scrapbook gets flooded with flattering comments. Unfortunately it also attracts some unwelcome attention with unknown guys wanting to be ‘frenz’. Huh????In Orkut, the word 'friend' is perhaps the most misunderstood term...sigh!

The second case was when an online friend refused to put her picture on because she wasn't comfortable with the way she looked. She felt people wouldn't want to know her because she didn't look good...Why would you want to know someone who is going to talk to you based on how you look?

So it struck me…that looking good has its perils too. Often it is the way you look and dress which gets you the attention of the wrong kind and statistically has led to uncomfortable situations. It also makes me wonder whether wanting to look good is a crime. There are times i wonder whether a certain person is talking to me because he likes the face he sees!!

Don’t get me wrong, compliments from friends are always welcome and appreciated, barring the ones which cross the line. But the second case also led me to think about how much people weigh looks. Do men get the same response from females? We women are conditioned to do a lot. We nurture, we manage homes, we multitask, we work, we don't adam-tease and we are expected to look good too. I don’t see men worrying about maintaining themselves as much as we women do…and it seems to be another millstone that we have tied to our own neck. Of course there are exceptions to every rule.

I don't consider myself beautiful but I like myself the way I am. I'm confident with my skin and i don't need to hide anything, neither my age nor my crows feet. Every wrinkle tells a tale and shows me the times that I have worried. Every laugh line too shares a beautiful story.

There is too much emphasis placed these days on beauty. You have botox, plastic surgery and hordes of anti ageing devices. I too have personal dislikes of certain aspects of my anatomy but no way will I mess with nature.Being always well manicured and coiffeured is a dream to me, as that is the privilege of the ultra rich.That does not mean i wouldn't visit a saloon. It is nice to feel pampered once in a while.

In a society which lauds a pencil thin figure and perfect beauty with pageants glorifying the same, it is easy to forget the value of the beauty within. When I see girls starving themselves to get that perfect body, I wish i could tell them that they are killing themselves. There is surely more to life than that impossible figure...

Attitude indeed matters and a positive outlook can get that glow in your face. I should know, because I have felt the change in me. Taking a little interest in how you look coupled with the right attitude is the first step. You need to feel confident to look good. If you don't like yourself, how would you ever expect someone else to?

My take on beautiful is, look good on a strong foundation of positive attitude, self assurance and inner peace. And my dear friend, don’t ruin your life chasing that perfect look, figure or beauty. Live healthy and enjoy life. Everyone has something attractive about them, it could be the way you talk, or the way you sing. it could be your sense of humor or the way you write. Find them out, develop them and believe in yourself. Let no one tell you or make you feel otherwise. When you feel good about yourself, it is bound to show outside too. My challenge is to be beautiful inside…

So ask yourself this and keep that finger pointed to yourself, and if you are a guy, do make that special girl happy by making her feel beautiful.Even a diamond comes from a not so beautiful rock.This was my view. What do you think?

Tuesday, January 1, 2008

it's a brand new year!!!

There is a silence in the thinking aloud household...the kids are too quiet and my mind refuses to cooperate...The last 10 days were very hectic, with my parents and nephews around. My boys had a terrific time with their cousins...not so the neighbors...and time just flew...and now, after the hullaballoo of the week before, the silence is too loud...:(

It is a strange feeling to get up with no agenda, no mom to smile at, no dad to pamper, and nothing to do...*Of course i have to help Swaraj finish the school project but that's not what i want right now*....

I loved the role reversal, when they were here. It was my turn to pamper them, which i did to my heart's content. As usual they felt I was too thin, not looking after myself and doing too much. As usual, I felt I should be doing more for them...It felt great to be giving back in some way

I'm going to take my time and leisurely read all the posts i've missed. I've managed a to catch up on a few good ones. One of the first posts happened to be Madhumita's review of the movie'KITE RUNNER. Ziah finally posted her new chapter making my day, Ps gave me a wake-up call, and hip grandma's nostalgic tale took me back in time...gosh, i've missed quite a lot of good ones...

This is such a great way to start the new year...My mind's still in a feel good mode, i don't feel like pressing it to function...I still have a week of vacation left and i'm going to live it up with the kids and hubby...

It is a beautiful morning here and I'm drunk with joy and contentment.So, here's raising a toast to 2008...I'm looking forward to more writing, seeing a few goals achieved, raising a few bars here and there and continuing being friends with my children!

It's a brand new year, what will you do with it?

New Year 2008 Glitter Graphics from

Coincidentally this happened to be the propmt at sunday scribblers...